“I've
got a hunger, twisting my stomach into knots. That my tongue was tied off. My
brain's repeating, "If you've got an impulse let it out.” But they never
make it past my mouth. Our youth is fleeting; old age is just around the bend.
And I can't wait to go gray. This is the sound of settling.”
Chapter 21
My eyes flutter open and I groan. The dream I had been having was the best of
my life. I didn’t want to wake up. I roll over onto my side and bump into the
warmest, most soothing body I had ever felt. Then I see his face and my heart
is so full it could burst. It wasn’t a dream. Brian was here. Right next to me, snoring away. He will swear on his Armani
suits and Prada shoes that he doesn’t, but I tell you
now, he does.
I sit up
slowly and look around the bedroom. Our bedroom. I
smile and let out the most satisfying sigh of my life. This was it. I had
arrived. I take one more look at Brian, and slowly and gently get out of bed. I
pad barefoot and naked down the stairs and into the kitchen. I run my fingers
along the waffle maker and wish we had food here so I could cook for him the
breakfast I should have made him 10 years ago after the wedding. God, how could
I have been so stupid? I lost 10 years. 10 fucking years I could have been
here, living here, in wedded bliss with Brian. But no, me and my goddamn
fucking pride.
“God Dammit.” I groan.
“It was
only time Sunshine.” His voice breaks me from my daze and I jump a mile in the
air.
“Son of a bitch!” I yell and whirl around. Brian is standing there, sheet
bundled around him, looking at me with a sullen look.
“Don’t
beat yourself up about it.”
“I don’t
know what you’re talking about.” I tell him and open a cabinet. He has to at
least have coffee in the house.
“You were
thinking you wasted all that time. Not being here.” I turn and look at him.
Since when could he read minds?
“I…I just…10 years Brian. 10 years I wasted.” He walks to me and brings me into him
and wraps the sheet around the both of us.
“It
wasn’t a waste. And I told you then and I’m telling you now. It was only time.
You said it yourself that night at the hospital with your dad. It didn’t matter
how long we were away from each other. Nothings changed.” I lean up to kiss him
and he tastes like…Christmas morning.
I smile
to myself at the thought.
“What are
you smiling about?”
“I
thought you could read minds all of a sudden.” I smirk at him and he raises an
eyebrow at me.
“Hmm..you’re thinking you want to
give me a Christmas blow job.” He devours my mouth again and I feel his cock
harden on contact.
“Can I
least have coffee first?” I ask against his lips.
“Yea but
we gotta hurry.” He tells me. I look at him with a
confused look. He continues.
“I have
to run and pick up some stuff before we go to Michael’s. You know last minute
gifts. So I’m gonna drop you off at your mothers
before I go.”
“But why
can’t I go with you?”
“Cause Sunshine. Daphne is meeting you right? To come to
the party? Just go with them to Michael’s and I will right behind.” He
kisses me softly. “I promise.”
He is up
to something I just knew it. I know that look. I know that devious smirk. I
knew him. Period.
Thank god
he actually had coffee. I made it, we drank it naked in the kitchen while we
kissed, groped, and I finally gave in and gave him his Christmas blowjob in the
middle of the kitchen. And then I got returned the favor in the shower, 10 minutes
later.
We
dressed in the clothes we had packed to come here with. Him,
in nice dark blue jeans and a black button down shirt. God he was
beautiful. He helped me button my own blue shirt I had gotten at Hugo Boss when
I lived in
“What?” I
ask.
He shakes
his head. “Nothing.” I grab his arm and pull him back
as he tries to walk away.
“Tell
me.”
“You
just…you look hot.”
A huge
smile spreads across my lips and I practically jump into his arms. Our tongues
dance as I kiss him.
“No…no…stop…we…gotta…go…” He says in between lip tangles.
I groan
and break the kiss. “Fiiiiine.”
“God
Justin, stop being such a queen. We have all the time in the world.” He wraps
his arms around me and kisses my forehead. He was right we do. I wasn’t going
anywhere and by the way he had his arms around me, I knew he wasn’t either.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When my
we pull up to Michael and Ben’s my heart sinks a little because I don’t see
Brian’s car. He isn’t here yet. Where the hell is he?
As soon
as I open their front door, the noise level inside the house almost deafens my
ears.
“Justin!”
Melanie yells and she engulfs me in a huge hug. She hands me a large manila
envelope and smiles. “Done.” I take it from her and
smile gently.
“Thank
you.”
“You
ready for all that?” She asks. I look straight in her eyes.
“I’ve
been ready since the day I met him.” Her eyes get soft and she kisses my cheek.
My
mother, Daphne and I make our way into the house and make our rounds. Ted and
Blake were snuggled on the couch together drinking wine and they smile at me as
I walk past them.
Emmett is
running around like a mad queen making sure the table was set right and the
flowers were arranged the exact way HE wanted them. He waves at me and I smile.
I give
Hunter a huge hug when I finally see him. It had been 10 years and he had grown
into a man. A successful man from what I hear. He went to college and now works
at a financial firm in Philly. He tells me he didn’t want to leave PA. He
wanted to be close to home. I told him I knew the feeling well.
Michael
and Ben were bringing food out to the table when I finally see them and JR is
close behind, following Michael around where ever he went. Daddy’s little
shadow.
When I
finally reach the kitchen I see Lindsay and I stop. God.
I didn’t want to do this. Not today. She turns around and gives me a gentle
smile. I try to smile back but I can’t force it out.
“Justin,
I know you’re angry at me.” She says.
“To say the least.” I fold my arms over my chest.
“I owe
you an apology. I should never said the things I said
to you. You are an adult and can make your own decisions. It’s none of my
business what goes on between you and Brian.”
My
expression softens and I unfold my arms.
“I love
him Lindsay. And I want to be with him.”
“I know.
And that’s ok.” She walks to me and hugs me. I wrap my arms around her. “It’s
more than ok.”
“You
moving in on my other parent now Sunshine? Jeeez.” I hear Gus’s voice
behind me. Linds and I break our embrace and we smile
at Kinney Jr.
“Merry Christmas Gus.” I say to him.
“Merry Christmas. So where is my Dad?” He asks.
“Yea
where is Brian?” Linds looks at me questionably.
“I
honestly don’t know. He said he had some last minute things to pick up.”
“Presents?
Jeeez you guys must have had some hot sex last night
for him to actually get GIFTS.” I punch Gus in the shoulder.
“Shut
up.”
I make my
way back out into the living room and find my Mom talking to Ted and Blake on
the couch and Daphne wrapped in deep conversation with Hunter. I take a deep
breath and smile. This was my family. Where I belonged.
I hear
the front door open and Brian emerges smiling from ear to ear.
“There
you are!” I walk to him and he throws his arms around me and rocks side to side
as he kisses my mouth, hot and urgent. I almost can’t breath we are kissing so
deeply. When we finally end the kiss we turn around to find the entire crowd
gawking at us.
“What…the…”
Ted begins.
“I second
that.” Michael says.
Brian
nuzzles his face into my hair and inhales. He can’t stop smiling.
“Tell
them.” He whispers in my ear.
I look at
him stunned. “Now?”
He nods
and we face the crowd. His arm is around my shoulders and his head is pressed
against mine. Holy shit.
“Ok
well…um I have made some decisions. I sold my gallery in
A gasp
falls over the gang and I look at Lindsay immediately for his disapproving
look. I don’t find one. In fact as I glance around the room, I find not one
disapproving look. All I find are smiles and love.
“I sold
the gallery and with the money I enrolled back in school. I’m going to be a
teacher’s assistant at PIFA until I graduate and then I am going to find a full
time teaching job. In
‘Yah’s’ and ‘Woot’s’ and clapping
fill the air as everyone stands to his or her feet to congratulate me. I beam.
I couldn’t believe how wonderful they were all being.
“And you
Brian?” Michael asks smiling.
“Me?
Well…I’m still the same.”
“Ok, let
me rephrase Michael’s question. You and Justin?” Ben
asks.
“Oh.” He
laughs. He looks at me and we both smile. “We are…we are together as we will
ever be. He isn’t going anywhere. I know that now. And neither am I.”
‘Awwww’s’ escape our friend’s mouths and Lindsay and Michael
rush to us. I hug Lindsay while Michael and Brian share the same embrace. When
we part I see my mother with tears in her eyes. I go to her and throw my arms
around her.
“I’m so
happy for you honey.” She tells me.
“Thanks
Mom.”
“Well it’s
about fucking time you crazy kids got back together. I was tired of Dad being
such a drama queen all the damn time.” Gus lightens the mood.
Brian
walks to his son and we all wait for the legendary smack on the back of the
head. It doesn’t come. Instead Brian pulls out an envelope out his coat pocket
and hands it to his son. He hugs him and Gus surprised at first keeps his hands
at his side. But Brian doesn’t let go and Gus finally wraps his arms around his
father.
We spend
the next hour socializing. We eat, drink wine, and all the while Brian never
leaves my side. His hand was either always intertwined with mine or his arm
around my shoulder. We shared kisses and nuzzles. He couldn’t keep his hands
off me. And I didn’t mind one bit. We finally get a free moment and I pull him
into Michael and Ben’s den away from the crowd. I had left the manila envelope
Melanie had given me on the coffee table.
“I have
something for you.” I tell him. His eyes narrow.
“No
presents.” He tells me. “You gave me enough last night.”
“Shut
up.” I hand him the envelope. He winces and opens it slowly. I bite my
thumbnail nervous. I didn’t know he was going to react to this.
He takes
out the papers and reads slowly. His eyes soften and he brings his lips into
his mouth. “What did you do?” He finally asks.
“Its OURS now. Not just mine. I put the house in both our names.” I exhale slowly.
“Justin…”
“Shut
up.” I tell him again. “This is what I want. It was never just mine. It’s
always been ours. We can decide what WE want to do with the house now. Whether
we sell it or live there, it doesn’t matter. It will be OUR decision.”
A small
smile spreads over his lips and he nods, accepting it.
“There’s
more.” I tell him a wide smile spreading across my face.
He shuffles
the papers and reads more. His eyes widen and he looks up at me.
“Is this
for real? I mean it says ‘Official legal document’ but this cant
be real.” He says.
“I had
Melanie draw it up. The house papers are real. This one isn’t. But I figure,
it’s the closest thing to be being married as it comes.”
He reads
the paper. “Mr. Justin Taylor is now the sole property of Mr. Brian Kinney.” He
laughs. He looks at me and a devilish smile appears on his lips.
“So does
this mean you have to do WHATEVER I say?”
I punch
him lightly in the stomach. “Like I don’t already.”
“So lets test that theory. Get on your knees.”
“Brian!
No. There are children here.”
“Shit
that’s what makes it hot.” He tries to push me down and we wrestle for a few minutes
laughing and kissing.
“Um, I’m
sorry to interrupt, but Dad there is a delivery here for you?” We hear Gus’s
voice behind us.
“Oh. Ok.”
Brian smiles at me and takes my hand. Oh god. What has he done? I KNEW he was
up to something.
He leads
me outside and as soon as I see it, I stop dead in my tracks.
“What
the…” There was a red convertible mustang sitting outside Michael’s house. I
look at Brian and he just smiles.
“You did
not get me a mustang.” I tell him.
“It’s a
1970 Mustang Convertible.” He corrects me.
“You
cant…I wont…”
“I did.
And you will.” He kisses me. “You’re gonna need a way
to get to and from school and work. And I’m not driving your ass everywhere and
you can’t take my car.”
“Brian, I
can just take the bus.”
He
smirks.
“There
are no buses from
“You got
him a car!” We hear Michael screech. We turn around to see the gang had piled
outside onto the porch to see what the commotion was about.
“What the
fuck is in
***